


brave enough

by the_sunshine_dims



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Anxceit - Freeform, Confessions, Cuddling, M/M, Violins, accidently confessions, hearing stuff your not supposed to
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:40:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24299740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_sunshine_dims/pseuds/the_sunshine_dims
Summary: janus plays the violin in secret, one night another side hears him.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders
Comments: 3
Kudos: 76





	brave enough

**Author's Note:**

> the song is "brave enough" by lindsey stirling

Janus lets his lips twist into a small smile as he pulled the instrument from under his bed out of its case.

He quickly looked over at the clock again just to make sure Remus would be asleep, once he confirmed in his mind that no one would hear him he carefully checked to make sure it was properly tuned before playing softly.

“There was something I should’ve said, I was too afraid. It was just so hard to let you know, and now it’s all too late.” The first time he played this song he pretended it didn’t mean anything to him,

“What we had was beautiful, I didn’t wanna wreck it all. Everyday I think about the truth,” he sung quietly, though the lyrics were slowly getting louder,

But now it started being a way to cope with his emotions, he didn’t know if it was healthy or not but it worked, so he started playing the violin and singing more often, though always late into the night so no one could hear him, 

“I wish I was, I wish I was, brave enough to love you, brave enough to love you…”

He continued to sing, softly, even as the tears pricked his eyes and fell to his lower jaw.

Eventually the song ended, and after the euphoria of playing the violin passed his stomach dropped,

Suddenly he was reminded that his door wasn’t in the dark sides hallway. 

It was with the light sides, with roman, virgil, patton, logan, remus..

He froze, the lightsides had worse sleep schedules then he did,

Especially one Virgil sanders.

The one he had Been singing about,

_ Singing. _

He took a shaky breath, trying to use the unsure memory of hearing no stepping outside his room.

But that is destroyed once he reminded himself he hadn’t been paying attention to anything else 

It was also destroyed when he heard a soft thump coming from right outside his door and a quiet Yelp following it, terrified that it might’ve been caught.

He slowly got up from his bed, he took a shaky breath before opening the door,

_ He didn’t want to open the door, he just wanted to leave it alone, pretend no one was there, pretend no one heard, he wanted to leave the door closed and pretend it was nothing. _

He refrained from throwing the door closed and hiding in the closet when he saw Virgil,

Panicked Virgil trying to get his mind to make up an excuse of why he wasn’t listening.

Honestly if he had been singing any other song he would’ve actually liked- if not loved the fact Virgil had been listening to him singing, it would mean if nothing else he found his voice less then bad, maybe even comforting, he stills would’ve been embarrassed but it would’ve been untangled with a small bit of pride.

But that was not the case.

Virgil had listened to him pine and be  _ vulnerable,  _ for  _ him _ .

So his eyes were wide as he laid eyes on Virgil, keeping deadly silent, not allowing himself to speak a word, not trusting his voice.

That why he was so grateful when Virgil was the first to speak, haven gotten past the excuses in his mind and instead uttering a soft “should we talk?” 

All Janus could do was nod slowly before letting him in and sitting across from each other awkwardly.

they both stayed quiet for a couple long minutes before Janus spoke up, voice wavering, “I’m sorry..”

“No- dee- err- Janus, you have no reason to be sorry,” he told him, gently grabbing and holding his hands in his own.

Janus paused for a moment, before looking to the ground, “is-“ he took a breath to seal himself, “...is it.. Ya know.. mutual?” He wished he could’ve hid the fragility in his voice as he asked.

“Janus, you know me, if it wasn’t I probably would’ve avoided the task at hand for like… a year.” he chuckled humorlessly

“...so it is?” He asked again.

Virgil gave a laugh before pressing their foreheads together “yeah, it is.” 

Janus couldn’t help but squeeze Virgil's hands in sleepy love filled excitement.

Virgil chuckled again before standing up slowly, “Janus, it’s really late, let’s talk this over more in the morning,” he carefully pulled Janus up with him, “yeah?”

Janus grinned “okay, one condition though,” 

Virgil looked at him confused and he continued “Cuddles,-“ Virgil raises an amused eyebrow up at him “-hey! I’ve just been told my feelings are mutual of course I want cuddles!” 

Virgil chuckled lightly and Janus made an offended noise in response.

Virgil smiled softly “okay” Janus grinned in reply.

The two quickly located on the bed, Janus curled up against virgil's chest,

Janus fell asleep almost immediately, Virgil following soon after.


End file.
